The Paradox of Life: Joy and Pain

"That's the paradox of this living on this earth, that in the midst of great pain,
you can have great joy as well."
-Kathy Mattea

No matter how much we want to deny it when the going gets tough, we can have joy in the midst of pain. The key to having joy is to choose it.

Two months ago, I made a choice that marked a turning point in my young adult life.  A HUGE choice. THE huge choice.  For years I felt I wanted to let be or postpone the "good" things in life (e.i. relationships, recreational activities, marriage, etc.) until I felt good again, because I couldn't really enjoy them now (half the time I could hardly get out of the house for heavens sake!).  But I came to the realization that I was allowing the pain to have a death-grip on my life, and why in the world was I letting it do that in the first place?!?  I was not going to let this pain control me any longer. No siree!!  I decided I was not going to let my pain stand in my way and prevent me from moving forward.

I recall a gal in church recently commenting that when we make good choices, "There is power that comes with that choice." After I made my choice, I had to put forth a LOT more physical, social and emotional effort than usual to push past the pain and push outside myself into uncomfortable territory. But with those things came power and help from the Lord and immediately blessings began to pour down on me. Those blessings have brought great joy into my life. That joy has sustained me the past couple of months. It's interesting how a good period of your life can be followed up by, or simultaneous to a rough one. I have found that these past two months have been wonderful and amazing, so full of blessings and answered prayers. They have been so joyful.  At the same time, I've had a few new problems pop up and they've been extremely taxing, both physically and emotionally and have left me, many days, completely drained from sun-up to sun-down. I haven't been able to get on top of them, no matter how hard I try. It seems I'm hitting a brick wall with every attempt to understand and resolve the situations. I may not have the answers yet, but they are out there somewhere!

The message today is one of gratitude, happiness and joy!!! You can have great joy in the midst of great pain. It is possible! Maybe not everyday. Maybe not every week; for there is pain that is so deep that it has to be worked through. I've worked through part of mine, and I'll continue to work through it each and every day. When I wake up each morning, I have to recommit myself to "Look Up!" as Pres. Monson would say.

When you wake up tomorrow morning, what will you choose?

A moment of joy with Maeg's on a particularly painful day!

Humbly Proud to be an American

Independence Day has come and gone, and with it the patriotic flame that resides within me has been restoked to it's highest degree, as it usually does at this time of year. For those that know me, you know how  big a supporter and fan of our armed forces I am and how much I enjoy US History. But even they do not know deep my patriotism goes. Patriotism isn't something that can be measured by how many flags you fly in your yard or how red white and blue you dress on national holidays. No, patriotism is something far greater than that.
I have always loved my country and felt grateful that God sent me to this blessed nation.  But there were two events in my life that instilled in my a humble pride for our nation, it's citizens and those in our armed forces who've lived and died to serve and protect it.

Turning Point  #1: I was 8 years old in a performing group called Young Harmony when our director, Shelly, pulled out a brand new piece of music, a song called, God Bless The USA.  I had never heard this song before in my life, but when Shelly pushed the 'Play' button and the opening chords of Lee Greenwood's beloved classic began to fill my ears, chills ran up and down my arms and an overwhelming warm feeling overtook my heart. I instantly loved this song. At the end of each and every performance we had that summer, the three separate groups that made up Young Harmony filled the stage and with religious fervor usually unaccustomed to youth our age, belted out the message that we were
                                                "Proud to be an American, where at least I know I'm free
And I won't forget the men who died who gave that right to me
And I'll gladly stand up next to you
And defend Her still today
Cause there ain't no doubt, I love this land
God bless the USA."

To this day, God Bless The USA remains one of my favorite songs. Almost every time I hear it, it brings tears to my eyes. And one of the reasons for that it because of the increased meaning the song has for me because of Turning Point #2!

Turning Point #2 came with my 7th grade trip to Washington DC. What a trip! It started out as a mess because it was hot, humid and, to tell you the truth, our nation's capitol is very, verrrrrry dirty. No joke. Dirtiest city I have ever been to in my life. Yuck. But when we tweens started getting over that, the magic happened.

I had read and learned about the sacrifices made in American history, but never before had it been right before my very eyes.  There was such REMEMBRANCE in this place. President Spencer W. Kimball said "The most important word in the dictionary is remember," and everywhere you go in D.C. that's what you get. Places like The Washington, Lincoln, FDR and Vietnam and World War's I and II Memorials, and my personal favorite, Arlington National Cemetery.  It is those things that instilled in me a love and respect for my country and for those who've served it, some to the point of giving their own lives.  

I bowed my head at the tomb of the unknown soldier where my best friend presented a wreath at the Changing of the Guard Ceremony.

I touched the names of those who lost their lives or went missing in action at the Vietnam Memorial. 

I saw the crosses that sat row upon row in Arlington, each graced with a small American flag.

 I stared in awe at the statue of the U.S. Marine Corps Memorial, portraying 6 soldiers raising Old Glory over Iwo Jima.

I tried as hard as I could to hold in the tears at Vietnam War Nurses Memorial, but I just lost it. I could feel that the ground on which I was walking was sacred; none more than in Arlington. And the blood that had been spilt and the hearts that had been broken deserved our reverence and deepest respect.

I spent 7 days in D.C. and there were so many more things I was able to see, visit and do. But aside from all the fun experiences was a most precious gift-the gift of humble pride and gratitude for my amazing country and the amazing individuals who live in, serve and protect it. A truly amazing gift indeed. God Bless America!

Pic taken from our Hawaii trip, U.S.S. Bowfin, Pearl Harbor, October 2011

What experiences shaped the way you feel about America? Please share your stories here! :)