Help Me Find It

The path of life takes us through some pretty crazy and hard twists and turns. We come up against circumstances that throw us for a loop and have to make decisions on which fork in the road we are going to take, sometimes seemingly completely blindly. But the truth is with faith, we are never blind. If we ask our Heavenly Father where we are to go, what He wants us to do and how we wants us to do it, He will answer and direct each and every step of the path. And I mean every single step.
Recently I have had several friends that have been trying to decipher what the Lord wants them to do in their lives, which way their pathways are supposed to lead. I too was having a challenging time making a decision about what path I was to take for something in my life. I had received strong impressions and knew I needed to find out what to do, and I asked God what I was to do, but it took some action and effort on my part to get the answer, but eventually I did. The answer seemed to go against all reason, but the it was completely clear what I was to do. But, as it usually goes, I had no idea where this path was going to lead. I decided to put my faith in my Heavenly Father and go forward anyway.

A song that came over my Pandora station tonight, one that I have heard dozens of times, spoke to me in a completely new way. When I heard of it I thought of my dear friends and the challenges they are facing right now.  It is called Help Me Find It, by the Christian group Sidewalk Prophets. Needless to say this is my next itunes purchase.  This is a beautiful song that helped me put things in perspective, and to be okay giving my will over to His. Whatever it is He wants me to find, to have, He will give it to me, even if it is just peace for the moment.

Here's the lyrics and video. I hope this song touches you too.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CsjZ94K7UQs

Help Me Find It
I don't know where to go from here
It all used to seem so clear
I'm finding I can't do this on my own

I don't know where to go from here
As long as I know that You are near
I'm done fighting
I'm finally letting go

I will trust in You
You've never failed before
I will trust in You

(Chorus )
If there's a road I should walk
Help me find it
If I need to be still
Give me peace for the moment
Whatever Your will
Whatever Your will
Can You help me find it

Can You help me find it

I'm giving You fear and You give faith
I giving You doubt
You give me grace
For every step I've never been alone

Even when it hurts, You'll have Your way
Even in the valley I will say
With every breath
You've never let me go

I will wait for You
You've never failed before
I will wait for You

Chorus

I lift my empty hands (come fill me up again)
Have Your way my King (I give my all to You)
I lift my eyes again (Was blind but now I see)
‘Cause You are all I need

If there's a road I should walk
Help me find it
If I need to be still
Give me peace for the moment
Whatever Your will
Whatever Your will
Can You help me find it

Yes, He can. Yes, He will.

Trouble Teaches, Trouble Transforms

I finally finished "Making Sense of Suffering" by Wayne Brickey. The timing was perfect, as my body has been revolting against me the last two weeks and I have been tired and near falling into my pit of despair. The second to last section, "A Perfect Schoolhouse" brought me peace and strength to not give into the discouragement and hopelessness. It talks about how trouble teaches and transforms.  It is so powerful I have re-written it here for all to read. I hope it gives you strength and hope as well :)

"Mortal life is a marvel of elegance, but by heavenly standards it is coarse of flesh. Wisely designed imperfections-mental, emotional, and physical-make our bodies the perfect schoolhouse. They indicate to heavenly friends that we are still in school, facing problems not found in heaven.
  It is good for me that I have been afflicted; that I might learn thy statutes. -Psalm 119:71
Mental imperfections severely limit memory and thought for the spirit within. When Nehor offered his falsehoods to the the Nephites, "many did believe on his words, even so many that they began to support him and give him money." In their first estate, none of these people (not even Nehor) would have bought such nonsense. But in the mental limits of the second estate, they embraced what they once rejected. In this schoolhouse, we pass test by trusting rather than brains.
Emotional imperfections permit salty tides to toss the spirit to and fro.  But we still have a choice: swim or drift. our best efforts in the strong waves of emotion may seem weak. But what matters is our exertion, not our position, in the ocean of emotion. Will we at least try to imitate the calm and dignity of our Exemplar and turn to him for stability? Strong undercurrents surge from our upbringing, genetic influence, and chemical activity in the central nervous system. These are not always in our control, but in some degree we can react according to the light we have. To our degree, we choose whether to passively float along or actively battle the negative current.
Physical imperfections present all sorts of distractions relating to pleasure, pain, and fatigue. But we are dual beings. The finer part of us must get control of the coarser part before the two fuse together in the resurrection. The daily question is, "Shall I do with my physical temple what God would ask?"
This earthly school offers us our finest hours, even on ordinary days. The lab of the bitter cup teaches us to discern good from evil, polish from stain, living water from poison.  Our hearts develop perfect hearing and bearing. Graduation with highest honors awaits every learner who wears the garb of flesh with patience and faith.
   In much wisdom is much grief. -Ecclesiastes 1:18
The Lord gave Joseph Smith a sample list of troubles that might be permitted in the life of a righteous person, such as being hunted by bloodthirsty men, opposed by the forces of nature, or jailed unjustly.  Then the Lord explained that trouble serves two purposes.
   All these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good. -D&C 122:7
Trouble teaches. What did Joseph learn from his troubles? Above all, he learned that "the God of my fathers delivered me out of all, and will deliver me henceforth." Serious trouble can give us serious experience with God.  The more experience we have, the more we may witness his deliverance. Experience reveals the living God to be a faithful God.
   But trials will only give us knowledge necessary to understand the minds of the ancients. For my part, I think I never could have felt as I now do, if I had not suffered the wrongs that I have suffered. -Joseph Smith, History of the Church
Trouble transforms. We are here to do more than experience the goodness of God. We must acquire it.
   It seems to me my heart will always be more tender after this than ever it was before. -Joseph Smith, History of the Church
Because of the matchless way it teaches and transforms, a mortal life rich with difficulty is the best educational bargain in eternity.  It fits us to be witnesses, heirs, and friends of God. That is why it is worth the trouble."

What would a Holy Person Do?

"What would a holy person do?" That is the question Wendy Watson Nelson poses in her new book, "What Would a Holy Woman Do?" I have changed it up a tad to include both men and women for my purpose here. 

Sister Nelson extended a 3-day experiment to six friends. On each of the three days, each woman was to choose daily activity-something she would normally do-but now she would do it as a holy woman would. Each was encouraged to pray and ponder on it before she began the day. For example: how would a holy woman start her day? How would she read to a child, or exercise? How would she talk with a friend, or shop, or pray, or play, or do laundry? How would a holy woman handle or avoid a conflict?

How would a holy woman respond to her own success or failure? How would a holy woman use her time or energy? How would she welcome her husband or family members home? Would you be willing to try that?

It took me a few pages, but I got into this little book quickly as I read the different women's experiences. Each one shared their experiences and what they learned or how they grew from it.  They mentioned feeling more productive, more energized, more useful and purposeful. They had inspiration on how to deal with challenges in their daily lives and the rest of their days went much better when they acted like a holy woman would do.

It's funny. I had been thinking only the day before that I was so busy, always moving and doing many, many things, and even though I spent so much time doing so much, I didn't feel productive. I felt like I was always lazy, tired, and well, a failure.  I had prayed that morning that Heavenly Father would help me to become and feel more productive, more purposeful, and useful and this book was an answer to my prayers! So I took up this experiment.

I was amazed at the small yet big changes that approaching different activities in my daily life brought. On Day #1 my activity was reading the scriptures.  I read them more slowly and carefully. I gleaned more insight just by praying to do this as a holy woman and asking and acting sincerely.  I felt more peace as I started my day that carried over into the rest of it.  I felt less rush from the get-go and that Spirit stayed with me and helped me as I approached more things during my day.

Days #2 and 3 I choose to approach anything at work that would frustrate me as a holy woman.  I was more aware of myself and my reactions and therefore was able to choose the right as I approached work with this attitude.  I watched what I said and did. Those two days I was more a more proactive and effective provider and put more effort into giving the families I worked with good resources ad quality services. Despite a massive headache, I was so much more productive, more true and sincere in my duties. I felt like a better employee and a much better person overall!

What will you gain by taking the "What would a Holy Person Do?" challenge? Try it! You will be glad you will :)

What are your "Go to" Scriptures?

I have found gem after beautiful gem in the scriptures when I was least expecting it. Due to the circumstances in my life at those times, they spoke to me with greater power and, really, changed my life. They are now my go-to scriptures!

What are your go to scriptures? The ones that you go to when you are feeling troubled or need a pick-me-up? When you need perspective?

Here are a few of mine. Please, share yours!

Hebrews 11:39-40

(Speaking of those who were faithful, righteous and endured much hardship) "And these all, having obtained a good report through faith, received not the promise: God having provided some better things for them through their sufferings, for without sufferings they could not be made perfect."

Hebrews 10:32, 35

"But call to remembrance the former days, in which, after ye were illuminated, ye endured a great fight of afflictions...

"Cast not away therefore your confidence, which hath great recompence of reward."

Doctrine and Covenants 6:14

"Verily, verily, I say unto thee, blessed art thou for what thou has done; for thou hast inquired of me, and behold, as of often as thou hast inquired, thou hast received instruction of my Spirit. If it had not been so, though wouldst not have come to the place where thou art at this time."

Phillippians 4:12-13

"I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound; every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

"I can do all things through Christ, which strengtheneth me."

Mormon 9:21

"Behold, I say unto you that whoso believeth in Christ, doubting nothing, whatsoever he shall ask the Father in the name of Christ it shall be granted him; and this is the promise unto all, even unto the ends of the earth."

Cheers!

What Do You Know to Be True?

"The best way to obtain truth and wisdom is not to ask it from books, but to go to God in prayer, and obtain divine teaching." ~Joseph Smith

As we go through life, we learn things, some true, some false. Some truths of the world, others truths of God. Which truths can really make a difference in our lives? In the way we spend our time, talents, energy, and money? In the way we treat others, our bodies, the earth, and opportunities to serve, grow and learn? Which truths can really make a difference in the way we live our lives and in the joy we find in living?

Here's one truth I'd like to share with you. I know that Heavenly Father knows each of us individually and is in the details of our lives. I learned this truth through my experiences with my health challenges. I learned it directly from God, not from a book, a scholar or any other person. When I really started looking for His hand in my life, when I asked for and looked for His tender mercies and divine signatures, he answered and showed me He was there. Learning this truth has made an absolute change in my life, from being bitter, angry and feeling forgotten, to knowing He's there, and seeing and receiving His blessings in my life.  I see more good in others and in myself.  I have a deeper understanding of the Atonement, and that experience continues to help me and others. I know my Savior and my Heavenly Father more intimately and am nearer to them because of this truth.

Think about one thing you know to be true, a truth that has special meaning for you. Please read the following and click the "Comment" link below to share your thoughts. If we all add one more truth to this list, it is sure to help others learn those truths as well :)

Write about one thing you know to be true.
How did you learn that truth?
When did you learn it?
What difference has that truth made in your life?

My Testimony of the Grace

 Living with chronic pain and fatigue for over 12 years with little to no relief has been extremely taxing physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Every day is hard, and being functional in daily life is a difficult task that leaves me drained.  My hopes for resolution have been, as I describe it “dashed to pieces” over and over and over again. I have become bitter and angry many times, and frustration and impatience still occur, but not like they used to. It took me years to realize what the Atonement really, really means, and how much Heavenly Father knows and loves me.  I’d like to share with you what I learned about the Atonement, about grace, from these challenges.
 Let me start by asking you this question: When something bad happens in your life, what questions do you ask? Usually we ask “Why me?” Well, my main question was, “Do I not have enough faith, am I not good enough to be healed?”  After months and then years of exercising great amounts of faith for healing and having absolutely no success, I felt that somehow I was doing something wrong, that I didn’t really have enough faith because I wasn’t being blessed.  I thought I had to rely on my own merits and save myself without the Lord’s help in order to then qualify for His grace. That is where I was going wrong.
My turning point came when I hit rock bottom and realized that I could not save myself, that I needed redeeming, both in the physical and spiritual sense. It was at that time I read, “Believing Christ” by Stephen E. Robinson, and how he explained the true nature of the Atonement opened my heart and mind to what it really means.
The purpose of the Atonement is grace.  Grace in the New Testament is understood as “an attitude of goodwill that predisposes God to act positively towards us.”  In other words, before you became a spirit, before you could even earn any rewards or deserve any blessings, God was already predisposed positively towards you. Grace is therefore not something you can trigger, manipulate, earn, deserve or control. So where I thought I had to earn God’s love and grace was completely untrue.
 Grace is not the absence of God's high expectations. It is the presence of God's power. We don’t earn grace-we need it. We cannot ever, ever make up for every mistake, wrong turn, weakness or sin. Heavenly Father wants us to accept that truth, with the truth that Christ is the only one who can save us. His power is made perfect in our weakness.
 Imagine that the Atonement is an ice cream sundae. Sound odd? Just go with me here.  The viewpoint that “We are saved by grace after all we can do,” suggests that all the ice cream and scrumptious toppings on the sundae are our efforts and the tiny cherry on top is God’s grace for us.

 It belittles God’s grace to think of it as only a cherry on top added at the last moment as a mere finishing touch to what we have already accomplished on our own without any help from God. Instead the reverse is true of God’s grace and the Atonement for us: our efforts are the cherry on top added to all God has already done for us.
When I humbly and submissively accepted and applied God’s grace and the Atonement for what they really are, my life changed; I changed. My faith, hope and trust in Him and His plan for me increased. Even if these problems continue to rage, I know that because of Christ’s Atonement, I will one day be made whole. For the time being, I know He is with me every step of the way, comforting me because he experienced every single pain and heartache that I have. His grace covers my frustrations, my fears, my sometimes outright anger with the situation too. It is through those pains and heartaches that I am being refined.
 Hold onto this truth and never let it go: He loves you, He knows you, and His grace is sufficient for you.

Linked to Him

No matter how many rough patches I hit in life, each and every time I relearn how much challenges bring you closer to your Heavenly Father. No matter how close to the Lord I feel I am when my life is going well and I'm happy, it is never as near as when trials hit. I've been asking Heavenly Father to help me draw nearer to Him, so the rough patches may be partly my own doing. But I asked for this in complete submission to His will. When I ask for them, I have an absolute honest desire for Him to do with my life what He will.
I reviewed the book "Making Sense of Suffering" on the blog I share with my friend Sarah, and each time I read from it I am reminded the purpose for adversity. Reading from written works such as this help keep me going from day to day, sometimes hour to hour.
After a day that presented some new challenges that will be here for the months to come, a sob session with my dear mother, and prayers sent heavenward asking Why?, I sat down with the book-which I have almost finished!-and read the section entitled "Linked to Him".  It reminded me the real purpose, the amazing gift and blessing the Lord is really giving us when trials and tests come to us.
A day later things weighed so heavily upon me and threatened to overtake me, and I fell to my knees in the middle of my home, unable to hold in my words to my Heavenly Father any longer. I have known my whole life that my Heavenly Father knows me and listens to me, but that day I opened up to him with a completely new faith that my brother Jesus Christ feels everything I do. He knew exactly what I was feeling in that moment. I felt comforted and not alone in a way I never have in my life to this point. Reading and believing this passage helped me make that difference.
I want to share it in it's entirety here, I could not hold it back.

Linked to Him, Making Sense of Suffering, Wayne E. Brickey

        Surrounded by violent waves, the terrified disciples asked, "Carest thou not that we perish?"  Perhaps we have asked the same thing, but it is for us, not Jesus, to answer.  Does he care? Can we trust his friendship? Our answer tells how well we know him. Without storms, we can difficulty becoming acquainted with Deity.
        In all their afflictions he was afflicted...In his love, and in his pity, he redeemed them and bore them, and carried then all the days of old.

        The truth is that he delights in you and me.  He prepares a way and a place for joining him, and he waits for us to prepare ourselves.  He is closer than we think. Perhaps we have our comfort and pleasure alone, but our pain-nerve by nerve-is shared with a faithful friend. Yet, he is never hardened by his awareness of sorrow.  Our suffering may not be as real to us as it is to him!
         By the rod of trouble, we can bond with him and know that he is our friend. As proxy for us, he bore our heavy cross and asks us to take up light ones. As his proxies, we sometimes do the uncomfortable things he would do if he were here. He empathizes with us in a sacred and quiet fellowship.
         We are individually in His presence...Thank God for that principle...For such a principle to be omitted from the work of the Lord would be an omission too serious to contemplate. it could not be.
         Suffering makes our quiet companion more discernible. The veil, especially the part covering the heart, is thinner. He leans near with encouragement, suggestions, leadership, strength and peace. He consoles "Be of good cheer," and he whispers, "I will lead you along."  If we, like Paul, ask a thorn to be removed, he may quietly suggest another approach: "My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness."  If we hunger and thirst after righteousness, he fills us with the Holy Ghost.  If the path is steep with grief and suffering, he leaves the peak to join us and say, "Ye shall obtain." Thus does he gently make himself known.
         Who can say too much of his great power, and of his mercy, and of his long-suffering towards the children of men?...I cannot say the smallest part which I feel...We have been patient in our sufferings, and we have suffered every privation...Blessed by the name of my God, who has been mindful of us...I will give thanks unto my God forever. Amen."
         By our adventures with him in the storms, we discover that he cares, and we find ourselves wanting to honor him forever.  In every ordeal we see his hand steadying us and our oppressive burdens. We testify, "My God hath been my support." Our affection for him swallows up affliction. All our losses are gains if they link us to him.

                                  ***

I love this photo (Mark Mabry, Reflections of Christ) because you can see the love and hurt on Christ's face as he embraces this man, whom when I first saw it imagined myself instead, and see the Savior embracing me. This is what I think the reunion of the other side will be like, when he says, "I'm sorry you had to go through that," when he recounts the things you suffered, together.
He loves you soooooo much. He knows when you hurt. He knows what that hurt feels like.  It is so comforting, enabling, to know that you have a faithful friend that shares your pain, nerve by nerve. Your losses are gains if they link you to Him.